Couples and family therapy

                     Few things are as painful as losing the love and emotional connection we once shared with a partner...                      What interferes with a couple’s ability to hold on to the bond that once seemed so indestructible?  

Warning signs of relationship trouble 

Feeling of distance or apathy between you and your partner, drifting apart

Feeling like he/she "is not there" for you

Repeated conflicts that don't get resolved

   Not feeling loved, appreciated or respected

       Diminished sexual and emotional connection   

       Feeling increasingly attracted to others, infidelity

              Loneliness and leading parallel lives, (living like roommates)

       Presence of behaviors and attitudes that sabotage connection: criticizing, blaming, being defensive, expressing contempt, lack of attunement  

Recognize any of these symptoms in your relationship?

My experience with couples therapy began in the early days of my internship as a psychotherapist. I am- as I was then- fascinated with having the opportunity to help a couple transform their negative patterns of interaction into increased emotional connection. I use an approach that explores the impact of early life experiences with primary caregivers on the couple’s ability to form a secure attachment to each other and sustain their mutual bond.

Some of the issues that I’ve had the opportunity to help couples explore in my practice are:

  • How defenses formed to deal with pain and anxiety in childhood later come to limit us as adults in our ability to develop and sustain attachments.
  • How negative thinking and insecurity can sabotage intimacy and how couples can learn to challenge such negative thoughts in order to achieve greater closeness in their relationship.
  • Trust and betrayal. What are the factors that determine whether a couple will end up experiencing love and fulfillment in their relationship or suffering pain and distress.
  • How unresolved early childhood traumas can limit the ability to maintain intimacy.
  • How attachment styles influence life and what can be done to develop in ways that will improve relationships.
  •  How to minimize conflict, argue less and increase opportunities for experiencing a deeper connection by teaching effective marital skills.

Over 50% of first marriages end in divorce and less than 1% of divorced couples ever participated in counseling.  Second marriages are even more vulnerable to divorce, with 60-70% of these marriages failing. 

BE SURE TO SEEK HELP BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­

Unfortunately, many couples wait too long to address their conflicts until growing resentment or estrangement makes reconciliation difficult or leads to extra marital affairs.

Call for a free consultation to explore how I can be of help in enhancing connection with your partner and prevent your relationship from further deteriorating.

Vilma Sylvester, LMFT provides psychotherapy and coaching to individuals, teens, children, couples and families.  Her office is close to Albany, Emeryville, Alameda, Oakland, Piedmont, Walnut Creek and Lamorinda.  1664 Solano Ave. Berkeley, CA 94707

     (925)640-7481

 vilmasylvesterlmft@gmail.com

 FAMILY THERAPY

As a family therapist I focus on helping individuals within a family understand and improve the way they interact with each other and resolve conflicts together. This could include addressing family of origin issues, sibling relationship problems or parent-child relational problems.  Read more…